My counselor called this morning and said my pastor called to find out how I was doing and to discuss things.

I had already closed the door and revoked permission for my counselor to speak with my pastor so that I had a safe avenue for communication. He said my pastor sounded very caring and pastoral on the call and seemed to genuinely be interested.

I had worked so hard over the last week to move on and to accept that communication with that church was finally closed and I was starting to open myself to other options for my future. I truly desire reconciliation so that each of is is right before God and unity in God”s family is restored, but as this has continued on the pain has actually gotten worse instead of the adage that “time heals all wounds”. At this point I am very cautious toward any further contact with this pastor and church. So many jumbled thoughts and emotions are swimming through my head again.

God, I just want to be faithful to you and glorify you….no matter the cost. Show and direct me how to walk through this path and be the very best witness for your kingdom that I can possibly be! I love you more than the air I breathe and I will do whatever you ask, I just need to know it is of you. Help me walk in faith, fortitude, and wisdom.

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